If you have an ill or semi invalid partner, husband, spouse etc

This is the front porch of our forum. Pull up a chair, and talk about whatever's on your mind.
SandiSAHM
Posts: 2263
Joined: Fri Aug 28, 2015 11:46 am
Location: Oklahoma

Re: If you have an ill or semi invalid partner, husband, spouse etc

Post by SandiSAHM »

colonialgirl wrote: Sun Oct 21, 2018 5:07 amBut I think you should tell your sibling to go piss up a rope.
You have a way with words :D

Clem - is your sib ALWAYS mean? To cut a friend off because her husband is ill is just plain cruel.
clemencia2us
Posts: 11445
Joined: Fri Aug 28, 2015 9:21 am

Re: If you have an ill or semi invalid partner, husband, spouse etc

Post by clemencia2us »

SandiSAHM wrote: Sun Oct 21, 2018 2:48 pm
colonialgirl wrote: Sun Oct 21, 2018 5:07 amBut I think you should tell your sibling to go piss up a rope.
You have a way with words :D

Clem - is your sib ALWAYS mean? To cut a friend off because her husband is ill is just plain cruel.
Maybe they are just weird. They think that she is strange because she will take trips by herself with her other out of state friends. I'm sure if her hubby told her to stay home, she would.

I tell them to keep an open mind and not everyone is like them

Heck these are the same gals that took off on an overnight shopping trip while OUR mother was dying in the hospital. Now that i was totally mad at them and let them know it. So there is a disconnect there too.
Quilter51
Posts: 2815
Joined: Sat Aug 29, 2015 6:04 pm

Re: If you have an ill or semi invalid partner, husband, spouse etc

Post by Quilter51 »

I also thought she was declining. If she was accepting , I would think that was great! Her life didnt end when hubby got sick. I still might casually ask once awhile if there was anything she needed help and home in some way, but let those folks tsk, tsk all they want.
littlemiss63
Posts: 2516
Joined: Thu Aug 27, 2015 10:11 pm
Location: Middle Tennessee

Re: If you have an ill or semi invalid partner, husband, spouse etc

Post by littlemiss63 »

clemencia2us wrote: Sun Oct 21, 2018 4:49 pm
SandiSAHM wrote: Sun Oct 21, 2018 2:48 pm
colonialgirl wrote: Sun Oct 21, 2018 5:07 amBut I think you should tell your sibling to go piss up a rope.
You have a way with words :D

Clem - is your sib ALWAYS mean? To cut a friend off because her husband is ill is just plain cruel.
Maybe they are just weird. They think that she is strange because she will take trips by herself with her other out of state friends. I'm sure if her hubby told her to stay home, she would.

I tell them to keep an open mind and not everyone is like them

Heck these are the same gals that took off on an overnight shopping trip while OUR mother was dying in the hospital. Now that i was totally mad at them and let them know it. So there is a disconnect there too.
Isn't it amazing how easy it is for others to sit on the side-lines and make judgements about others when they wouldn't think twice about leaving a loved one. Your sisters, if that is who is making these remarks are proof of that. Rinty, I love you, never heard that expression before, but how fitting in this case@@@@.
ownedbydogs
Posts: 897
Joined: Fri Aug 28, 2015 7:26 am

Re: If you have an ill or semi invalid partner, husband, spouse etc

Post by ownedbydogs »

clemencia2us wrote: Sat Oct 20, 2018 2:17 pm OhJodi - she rarely declines.

The thing is that some people in our little group think we should stop asking her.

That she should stay at home 24/7 with her ill spouse.

I just think that we should give her the option. She does go out and do things with others and then they just tsk, tsk, tsk. :lol:
Keep asking her! My husband has been unable to get out much this yr due to extreme anemia issues. It has been going on for ay least 3 yrs. so bad that it has caused what they thought was dementia, along with falls he was so weak. Many times I had to call for help to get him up. Finally, a new gastro dr found he had fatty liver, causing bleeding. I got out some as dd was here to stay with him, in case he fell. Always within call distant and close by.
nbeaver
Posts: 128
Joined: Mon Aug 31, 2015 1:49 pm

Re: If you have an ill or semi invalid partner, husband, spouse etc

Post by nbeaver »

Just chiming in to agree: absolutely keep asking her! Caregivers NEED to get out and socialize and get a break. She is obviously enjoying the outings or she wouldn't be accepting. And if she ever gets to the point where she has to consistently decline, it is time to mobilize your friends to socialize with her in other ways, perhaps in her home every so often.
Post Reply